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This past week was a challenge for me. I was asked to put up four Finnish guests in my unfinished house. The builders said it would be ok, they could easily get the inside walls painted and the the floors varnished by the time the guests arrived. But as the date drew closer, it became clear that the builders were overly optimistic. The inside of the house was still a building site! How could I re-house 4 people at short notice?
I was feeling stressed and a bit overwhelmed with my task. The weekend before they were to arrive it dawned on me - just clear out the back extension (which was currently full of my loft contents) and bed them on two sofa's and two futons. I don't know how I cleared the space - but somehow I managed to create a sleeping area, a dining space and some kitchen area so they could have hot drinks and light foods. The only other remaining matter was the bathroom which I cleaned after the builders left. AND, the builders chose to work outside the following day so that I wouldn't have to re-clean it when they went home.I observed a few things about myself and others in this scene. Firstly, I was stressing a lot. But when I found a workable solution, the stress melted away and everything became easy. Secondly, when you're thoughtful and respectful of others, you get loads of cooperation. Never did I try to force the builders to stick to their estimates (I'd rather they did the job properly than rush anyway!). Instead I kept them informed, thanked them for their help, and checked with them about any changes. As a result, they worked late to make up for missed hours, worked outside while the guests were in residence and co-operated in so many other ways. Thirdly, instead of trying to make an unworkable solution work, I applied my efforts to finding a workable solution.
This is very different to how I would have operated in the past. I would have been demanding and stressed and made life miserable for as many people as possible. But this new method made everything seem easy and the guests had a nice visit.
Sometimes we get so caught up in making unworkable things work that we don't consider the alternatives. This is when we need to apply effort to come out of the situation, observe it, and make informed choices instead of emotional ones.
Today I was anxious. I had this anxious feeling. It had been plaguing me most of the day. I don't put much stock in feelings - I know they can be misleading. I tried to ignore this feeling and I couldn't, so I decided to take some time out and analyze. I don't often recommend analyzing - it can mean that you go off into wasteful expansion. But I was going into wasteful expansion by not analyzing, so I decided to have a look at where this feeling was coming from.
It was connected with money. Lately I've watched a lot of money leave our account. We're having an extension built, my car just got serviced, and I have an appointment with the accountant to discuss taxes. But it's not just that. I don't get anxious writing checks. I'm not too bothered about paying taxes. But I do get anxious about not knowing how much more will go out. AND having to justify extra expenses.
This anxious feeling was becoming overwhelming. I had discovered the triggered. Now it was time to adjust my perspective. So first, a few facts to consider which I didn't consider when developing my anxious feeling:
1. My justifications are fine if I'm satisfied with them. I don't have to satisfy anyone else.
2. Whilst I should consider care in handling money, if I review my actions and find that I have not erred in my handing of the money, then I should be satisfied with that. Even if I have erred, past is past. Learn the lesson and move on.
3. Make the drama small. This is one scene in the drama. If I attach importance to it and blow it out of proportion, then I will be trapped by all the feelings and emotions that go with it. If I see it as just a temporary passing scene, a part of one whole, then I put it into perspective. It becomes small and insignificant.
This last point is the most important and useful. It doesn't mean that I ignore what's happening with my money, it means that I can rid myself of unhelpful emotions - feelings that stop me getting on with other things. And once that feeling is in check, I can be effective once more.
Thanks for listening - I needed that. ;D
Surrender. I have to admit, I am not fond of this word. I have always been quite competitive. Not one to surrender but fight to the death - even if we were just playing capture the flag.
In Raja Yoga we're taught to surrender everything. Out of context, it sounds like a cult directive. But when I consider what it really means, a cult directive would be much easier!
In this day and age, there is a lot of sorrow. All of us are looking for happiness, peace, contentment. We're lumbered with diseased bodies and rising crime rates, financial uncertainty and national unrest, and if we're lucky enough to have kept our job, we're having to work extra hard to keep it. Stress is blamed for many of our illnesses, including those that lead to death. So, what chance do we have at true happiness?
The world is offering a lot of happiness. For example, vacations, parties, drugs (medicinal and recreational) - all of these are promises of happiness, but do they deliver? Vacations last 1-2 weeks or, if you're lucky, a bit more. But they do eventually end and you have to eventually face daily life again. Parties are also short lived. And drugs, well, you have to keep taking more and more to get the same levels of 'happiness'. In reality, these are just traps. We think they will give us happiness, so we buy into them, we invest emotionally into them, and then we're left disappointed and feeling like we've not had enough. How do we break out of these traps? Through surrender.
Surrender of what, exactly? Well, it's the ego* that says I need happiness in the form of food, drink, drugs. I need happiness in the form of vacations, sports, video games. I need happiness in the form of MySpace, YouTube, Facebook. As long as we feed ego with these things, ego will want more and more. Ego is never satisfied. Ego grows bigger with each feeding and hungrier as well. And so we end up spending our whole lives to feed ego.
On the other hand, we can surrender ego. Give up this false identity of the self and stop feeding it. The only way to get rid of ego is to starve it. Let it whither away to nothing. And when we do, it will no longer be our master. Surrender does not mean surrendering our possessions, our wealth, our personalities, but surrendering our ego. In Raja Yoga we are taught to use everything in a worthwhile way. Yet ego cannot be used this way, so it's best to just surrender it. And when we do, we are free to be who we really are and to experience constant bliss.
*By ego, I mean the false indentity of the self - often characterised as arrogant, self-centered, selfish, always right, etc. The ego is vulnerable and so we are always ready to protect it (defend it) and preserve it. And it's this need of preserving ego that keeps us trapped.
I've had a few days (more than a few) when I've sat down at the computer and have had nothing to write. All this knowledge at my fingertips and nothing inspires. Other days, I can't stop the ideas. Why is there a difference?
Another example is my daughter who comes home from school after an exciting day - she can't stop talking. Even if what she is saying is pure gibberish or something from the past, all of a sudden it's important and must be told! But she is not like this all the time.
I tend to focus my writings on those things spiritual. I could write about a lot of things, but I choose not to. That's discernment - not a block. I sometimes cheat by telling something about Hana and then relating it to something spiritual. ;D That's also choice. But a block is a block.
A block occurs when the flow from the inspiration to the inspired is cut off. I purposely chose something eternal (Supreme Soul / God) to inspire me to reduce the risks of not having inspiration. So, if the inspiration is eternal, then the block is happening somewhere else - with the inspired. The channel is not open. And this usually happens because of too much garbage. You've heard of garbage in/garbage out? Well, sometimes the garbage doesn't pass out - it gets stuck and creates a block.
How does one clear a block? Well, first of all, don't put in any more garbage! Secondly, sit in meditation and clear out the current garbage. Do this regularly and finally the inspiration will flow again. Just like my daughter's gibberish when she's had a really good day at school!
I don't like writing about politics. Partly because I don't feel knowledgeable enough to do so. But more so because people start taking sides. I have some friends who are happy with the American Presidential election results and some who are disheartened. Some comments have been quite passionate and almost scary. Everyone has an opinion. Should I be throwing in one more?America (my homeland) is a land of extremes. The weather gets very hot in summer and very cold in winter. There are green parks and forests and smoggy cities. There are the Rocky Mountains and the Great Plains. There is great jubilation and cries of distress. Why? It's just one election, one passing scene, one more government process.Attachment: When we get attached to the results we want, we set ourselves up for a trap. If we fail to get the result we want, our whole world caves in. If we manage to get the desired result, then arrogance can set in - 'Look how I made this happen.' However, if we can remain detached from the results - that is, we choose to be happy and carefree regardless of the results - then we remain strong, stable, and unshakable in any situation.Choose contentment - be happy.
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