Duvet Day? No way!

Duvet Day? No way!

Remember Duvet Day? If you don't, you can read my earlier blogs on the subject (only a few blogs back). I basically got so moody and miserable I would declare a duvet day.

In the latest blog on duvet day (the one with all the cute monkeys) I mentioned that my doctor suggested I 'not indulge the senses'. So this time around I laid off the sweets, in fact I cut out snacking altogether, including dry roasted peanuts. You would think that cutting out snacks would be enough to make anyone moody, but actually, I had some interesting results.

1. I did not notice ANY mood swings.

2. I did not get the usual cramps.

3. I did not put on weight.

4. In fact, I lost a couple pounds - something I'd been trying to do for the past year.

5. I was generally feeling quite fit and not having the usual bloating.

Wow, could my doctor have been right?!

Have a Snack-free Christmas, everyone!

Thank you for reading. For more information on Raja Yoga philosophy see www.bkwsu.org.

From Golf to Spiritual Bliss

From Golf to Spiritual Bliss

My husband used to take me to the driving range in an effort to cultivate an interest in golf. He enjoyed it and I thought I might enjoy it with him. He always kept me on the driving range though, realising that to allow me to play some holes would only frustrate me, frustrate him, and frustrate those playing behind us! I never quite got the knack of it. But there were moments when I hit the ball just so, and it would fly. It would literally sing though the air. Those were magic moments. Form, contact, swing - everything - was perfect and resulted in a perfect delivery. Good golfers aim to make these moments a regular constant occurrence. I could only manage a few of these, probably by accident! Still, I know the feeling you get when it does happen, I know that it's possible for it to happen and I know that given the time, practice and effort I could become a decent golfer.

Now lets use the same model for seeking happiness, enlightenment, or spiritual bliss. We can experience any one of these in fleeting moments. They happen upon us accidentally. We know they exist. Probably we believe they are gifts, that we have no control over when they come and go. But some make it their life study to make these momentary experiences occur with greater frequency and consistency. And a few have been rather successful at it. Just like golf, it takes a certain practice or effort to increase these spiritual moments. How?

Meditation seems to be the most popular tool. If you consider that happiness, bliss, and enlightenment are stages of the mind, then learning to master the mind and thought processes would seem the logical practice for achieving these. So we light a candle, put on some background music and sit cross-legged verbalizing 'om'. Any results yet?

Meditation is a good starting point. But there is something more, something extra required. Something that takes us beyond a daily physical practice. What is that thing?

I'll stop there to let you think about that. Reply with your thoughts - what do you think that extra something is. Together we can explore and perhaps even answer this deep riddle. Om shanti.

Thank you for reading. For more information on Raja Yoga philosophy see www.bkwsu.org.

Do you know where you're going to?

Do you know where you're going to?

I've had two words rattling around inside my head - Aim and Objective. I was looking for inspiration for a blog and wondered why I couldn't get inspired to write. I often get an idea and can't wait to write it down, but lately I've not felt motivated by anything. So I asked myself, what is the Aim and Objective of blogging?

In Raja Yoga we're encouraged to have an Aim and Objective. Without it, without purpose, you wander around aimlessly.

As Lewis Carroll said,

“If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there.” Many former down-and-outs swear by the benefit of adopting a purpose in order to turn your life around. Counsellors will suggest taking up a goodwill cause to grief stricken clients. An aim and objective will nourish the soul and give it the will to not only live, but thrive.

Raja Yoga teaches us how to work, play and dance in happiness. It teaches us how to build and maintain healthy relationships. It teaches us the deep secrets of who we are and where we come from. I'm a full time student of Raja Yoga because of the insights it delivers and I'm constantly refining what I've learned. So, I suppose my aim and objective in blogging is to give readers an introduction to these teachings so that they have the chance to work, play and dance in happiness, too.

Thank you for reading. For more information on Raja Yoga philosophy see www.bkwsu.org.

The Science of Happiness

This morning, feeling extremely happy, I wanted to share that feeling by blogging about it. However, a friend of mine has already written a wonderful and short article on the Science of Happiness which I will borrow from the Inner Wave newsletter, Issue 9 (

http://www.bkwsu.org/uk/newsletter).

The Science of Happiness, by Dr. Prashant Kakoday

The Greek philosopher Aristotle once said:

"Happiness is the meaning and purpose of

life, the whole aim and end of human

existence." Scientists today have also begun

to recognise its importance. So, what can

science tell us about happiness?

Many observations are contrary to commonly

held beliefs. For example, wealth beyond a

certain basic minimum doesn’t lead to happiness.

In fact, it’s been found that the happiest

are those who’ve discovered their own

strengths and virtues and use them for the

greater good.

Studies show a significant link between good

works and psychological wellbeing.

Motivated volunteers are happier, regardless

of personal circumstances. The link between

exercise and happiness is also recognised. In

some studies, regular exercise was shown to

be just as effective as anti-depressants.

There are also some insights into the chemistry

of happiness. Serotonin, a neurotransmitter,

plays a major role in our experience of

happiness - high levels of it within the

synapses are associated with a feeling of

wellbeing. Conversely, most people with

depression have low serotonin levels. If we

artificially raise the level of seratonin, the

body responds by lowering its natural

production. As a result, the ‘resting level’

goes down – when the external boost wears

off.

Things like coffee, chocolates and cigarettes

all artificially raise serotonin but with long

term ‘boom and bust’ results. The same can

happen with TV, Internet, sex, music, alcohol

and violence. A lack of serotonin leads to a

loss of self-control and increases negative

feelings like anger. By rediscovering our inner

source of happiness and freeing ourselves

from even one main dependency, we can

begin to raise our own serotonin levels.

Studies show that for many, one key relationship

in life is often the key source of happiness.

On the other hand, broken relationships

are the biggest cause of unhappiness. As

with other dependencies, we can use another

person like a drug: our serotonin level

becomes linked to the presence or absence

of that person.

So is there a formula for happiness? May I

suggest:

Happiness = Truth / Desire.

The fewer desires you have, the happier you

will be. Having the right information (truth)

leads to contentment. Having the right understanding

of the self, our purpose, our origins

and our true relationships should free us from

the cycles of boom and bust and lead society

to that ultimate happiness.

Dr Prashant Kakoday is a medical doctor,

who has been studying Raja Yoga meditation

for over 20 years. He co- rdinates Brahma

Kumaris activities in Cambridge and lectures

around the world on topics ranging from

science and consciousness to the holistic

principles of life and health.

Thank you for reading. For more information on Raja Yoga philosophy see www.bkwsu.org.

Loneliness?

Loneliness?

The last couple days I've been in a funny mood. I feel as if I don't belong anywhere, as if I'm not a part of any group. I feel no connection to anyone and so I just want to leave this world - to escape. Don't worry - these are not suicidal feelings. More like loneliness - feeling alone - feeling like I have nothing in common with anyone else.

I'm not a stranger to this feeling. It comes and goes. And as I get used to it, the need to escape lessens.

The funny thing about this loneliness feeling is that I know that I'm not the only one who experiences this. I'm not really alone! And this is somewhat comforting. For I know it's just another one of those human experiences. I don't have to act on it - merely tolerate it until it passes. And knowing this actually brings intoxication. I may be experiencing something less than contentment, but it doesn't mean I have to give into it. Instead, by letting it exist - by accepting it without letting it rule my life, I can get on with my spiritual work. This loneliness feeling then becomes like a cat, which follows me around until it gets hungry, thus leaving in search of food.

Thank you for reading. For more information on Raja Yoga philosophy see www.bkwsu.org

Duvet Day Revisited

Duvet Day Revisited

If you've not yet read my previous post about my Duvet Day, I suggest you read that before reading this - it will make a lot more sense.

On Monday, I declared it 'duvet day'. Then blogged about it. Then told a few friends about it. I have had some varying responses, which I found interesting and wanted to share.

Firstly, I'll just inform the reader that in Raja Yoga we are taught to have faith in God, faith in the drama (this world life), faith in the intellect (having studied Raj Yoga principles) and faith in the family (the spiritual family). So I listened to what some of my family had to say about duvet day.

My mother was worried about my moodiness, short temper, mental health. (I really should call her.) She gave some suggestions what was behind it. She thought it was a one-off thing. I wrote back that it was a regular monthly thing and that it probably was not really as bad as I made it sound in the blog (everything seems exaggerated when I'm in those states of mind so I really didn't mean to mislead if I did). She also told me she loved me. Awww. :D

My spiritual sister suggested I speak to a doctor. There is medicine you can take to help such a condition. "After all," she said, "you wouldn't want to strangle your husband." What?! Strangle my husband?! The thought hadn't really crossed my mind. But it makes me wonder about whether it crossed hers!

Another senior sister was concerned that I had gotten so bad that I would need to spend the day in bed. "But I didn't spend the day in bed - I was actually quite productive - that was the point of the blog." But she understood why my mother was concerned. Neither of us are the types to stay in bed, even when deathly ill. So I could see her point.

I also spoke with a doctor friend of mine. I asked him what is causing these bouts of emotion and temper. Am I just going through chemical/hormonal upsets or am I really really good at repressing something deep and troublesome? He assured me that it was more likely to be chemical/hormonal. He also suggested that if one resists indulging the senses, one can become less sensitive to bodily maladies and, eventually, they will hold no influence over the mental state. Hmmm.

Do I indulge the senses? Um, yeah - especially during (or just before) those phases. I get terrible food cravings and I give into them. Especially sweets. And looking back on how I feel after indulging, I can't help but believe he's got a point.

So I will be experimenting with renunciation during cravings. All in the name of science, better health and a better mental state.

Om shanti.

Thank you for reading. For more information on Raja Yoga philosophy see www.bkwsu.org.

When the going gets tough, the tough have a duvet day!

When the going gets tough, the tough have a duvet day!

The last few days I've been going through a phase of moodiness and high emotion. I will feel depressed and start crying for no reason. I will lose my temper and bite your head off for the slightest affront. I will drag my feet throughout the day with no motivation. And I will feel guilty for all of it!

Today I woke up to grey skies and the promise from BBC that the sun would not put in an appearance. I decided that instead of moping around, I would just declare it a duvet day. For those who have been following my blogs, you know that a duvet day means wrapping up in a duvet or quilt on the couch and eating some (or all) of your favourite foods. I declared to my husband (my biggest critic - yes, he's harder on me than I am) that I was having a duvet day, and he said nothing. Was this his approval? Or was he afraid of being confronted by Mrs. Hyde / the Incredible Hulkess / the Bride of Frankenstein rolled into one? I don't know, but because he didn't object, I felt ok about having a duvet day. Yes, this was going to be great.

I spent about an hour reading and eating breakfast. Next I got on the internet and did some surfing. I thought, while I'm here I might as well respond to some emails. I caught up on my admin tasks for my business. I then uploaded some photos for listing some items on Freecycle and Ebay. I started an Ebay selling account. When my husband asked if I'd do a small task for him, I responded, "I'll do anything you ask, as long as it's not unpleasant," which could be anything other than eating chocolates. But what he asked would only take 10 minutes of my time, so I generously gave up 10 minutes of duvet day without feeling put out.

The funny thing is, I think I got more done today than had it been a 'regular' day. I still kept up with the daily tasks of getting daughter ready for school, doing the school runs, cooking dinner and getting daughter and friend off to Brownies. I even got daughter and friend to do their homework. I was so productive today it's frightening.

I don't think it would be wise to label everyday 'duvet day' just to up my productivity. But it becomes an interesting case study. What made me more productive? What caused me to enjoy the day and feel refreshed by evening? Why do I feel such a high sense of achievement on what should have been a throw-away day? Why do I feel less moody?

The biggest difference I see is that I moved out of 'I should' awareness to 'I could'. I set no expectations on myself, so anything that got done was a bonus. I gave myself permission to rest, but only used what I needed. I removed the heavy mill-stone around my neck and just enjoyed a burden-free day. I did everything because I wanted to, not because I had to. It was very cool.

I don't know what tomorrow will bring. I feel it's too cheeky to declare two duvet days in a row. But maybe that's just what I need. ;D

Thank you for reading. For more information on Raja Yoga philosophy see www.bkwsu.org.